


I'd Spike That~

by MochiTamago



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Haikyuu - Freeform, M/M, Reader Insert, Various x male reader, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-25
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-07-26 18:27:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 16,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7585279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MochiTamago/pseuds/MochiTamago
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haikyuu!Various x Male!Reader<br/>Haikyuu oneshots with a male reader insert because there never is enough of them~</p><p> </p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sugawara Koushi

It was safe to say you weren't exactly the pinnacle of kindness. Whether it was because of the constant scowl on you face, the (e/c) eyes that seemed to scream "If you even look at me, I will end you", or maybe just the general bad attitude you had whenever anyone had the misfortune of socializing with you, you were a pariah amongst Karasuno and it was almost an unspoken rule to avoid you at all costs. The only person who could get close to you without worry about a black eye or acidic insults burning through their self-confidence was your little sister, (s/n), and it always surprised people how such a sweet little thing like her could possibly be related to you in any way. If anyone bothered to look closely though, they would realize that under that cantankerous personality of yours.....was a major sister complex. Which was why you were currently following her.

It was kind of impossible for someone of your tall stature and infamy to successfully hide as you trailed behind your sister, especially with you radiating that deadly aura of yours, but no one said a word in fear of facing your wrath and (s/n) wasn't the most observant person in the world anyways, so despite how much it shouldn't have worked, it defied all odds and did. And it led to you peeking through the gym doors, where your precious (s/n) was talking to...boys. Never mind the fact that you recognized the obnoxiously bright haired boy as someone in her class and she could have been simply asking about schoolwork or notes, this was beyond unacceptable. With that thought in mind and an intense glare on your face, you barged into the gym with all intents on stopping whatever was going on between that tiny orange child and your sister. At least until you had to stop in your tracks because holy shit, was there such thing as perfection incarnate? For once, your sister's "Nii-chan?" went unanswered as you gazed into warm brown eyes that was framed by grey hair you had the inexplicable urge to caress to see if it was as soft as it appeared.

It was quite the spectacle, the (h/c) third-year known for his seemingly inability to be nice and his violent tendencies, storming in with an obvious bone to pick only to freeze and stare at Karasuno's one and only Sugawara Koushi, the difference in appearance and personality obvious to the entirety of the volleyball team who were left watching in thinly-veiled worry. Even Suga felt slightly uncertain, though despite his confusion he maintained a gentle smile which unknowingly sent arrows straight through (Y/N)'s heart. "Ah...(L/N)-san. Did you need something?"

That's it. You were done for. This beautiful angel knew your name and didn't run screaming, there was only one thing left to do now. Face blazing red you scooped up Suga's hands in your own and bowed low, "Please marry me!!"

"E-Eh?"

"Nii-chan?!"

"What?!"


	2. Akaashi Keiji

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soulmate AU~

If life were a romance novel, the whole "soulmate" thing would probably be much more picturesque, a story you could proudly gush about to anyone who would listen. Unfortunately reality is shit in comparison to romance novels. You've heard it all before: "As soon as you hear those words, you feel complete. Like you found your missing puzzle piece," your mother would always say. Well it must have been nice to have "I'm not worthy of such a beauty as you, but I'd like to try to be. How about dinner?" on her wrist, not everyone could be so lucky to have someone as disgustingly sweet as your father. No, instead you had the words "Are you okay?" imprinted in curling script along your arm. In theory it was a nice thought-your destined-to-be was obviously someone kind enough to worry about you even at the first meeting. But like you said, that's only in theory; it loses its appeal when it's a phrase constantly directed towards you and you still have yet to meet your soulmate. So yeah, the reality of having a soulmate is not all sunshine and rainbows, especially when one happens to be the clumsiest person around. Hooray for you.

The day starts off like any other. Jolt awake when you roll off your bed and swear when your nose attempts to meld with the cold, harsh floor, deny said swearing when your little brother "oohs" and threatens to tattle (honestly your parents were used to it, but were adamant on you having a clean mouth around (b/n). Something about trying to keep him innocent. Innocent, ha. More like Satan spawn incarnate), and then it's a race to struggle into your school uniform without knocking yourself out from slipping while pulling your trousers over your plain (f/c) briefs (there was a time when you wore goofy printed underwear, but when you somehow managed to snag your pants on a desk and flash your heart-printed boxers to the class, you'd sworn off them if only to save yourself a little pride). Once clothed, you brushed your teeth and attempted to wrangle messy (h/c) locks into some semblance of neatness; then it's a mad dash to the kitchen where you snag your book bag, lunch, and shoes, kiss your mother goodbye, sneakily flip (b/n) the bird when he mockingly makes kissy faces toward you, and you're out the door rushing towards Fukurodani. Running late as usual.

Good thing your teacher is such a pushover, because falling through the doorway at his feet after the bell has rung gets you a mere "Late again (L/N)-san? Get to your seat please." It's a bit sad how used to your klutzy antics everyone in your class is, no one spares your befallen figure even a glance, but at least they no longer laugh or give pitying looks. Scrambling to your seat beside the window, you sigh and prop your head up with your hand, attention focused on the clouds outside. Just arrived and already you're eager to return home. The day drones on slowly, no stimulation provided to ease you out of boredom until it's finally time for (fav. subject), the only class you seem to be able to anticipate with something other than dread. And that's when you're faced with the only drawback of that class. Your long-time rival stands as an obstacle in your path.

Stairs.

Your (fav. subject) teacher is fond of you and understanding enough that she doesn't mind you coming in a little later than your peers as you're busy trying to survive the treacherous steps. Inwardly appreciating her generosity, you painstakingly begin your ascension. All seems to be going well and decent progress is being made (okay so maybe four steps isn't much progress, but whatever) when a miscalculated movement proves to be your downfall. Literally. A sharp crack! echoes through the halls as face meets step and you slide down with a (admittedly girlish) wail.

"Are you okay?"

And there it is, once again. Those ever-haunting words you don't seem to have an escape from. But for once you can't really find it in yourself to mind. Your mouth tastes like blood and you're willing to bet a tooth is chipped but all you notice are dark eyes and even darker hair, how long his lashes are and fuck, his mouth is almost sinful with how pink and perfect it is. Right, he was speaking to you, come on (Y/N) be charming and suave, impress this absolutely lovely stranger.

"Looks as if I just fell for you, huh?"  
........nailed it.

His (oh so gorgeous) eyes widen and okay, maybe you should save those kinds of lines for when you're not slurring and spitting blood as you speak because he looks more surprised than charmed. But that doesn't seem to be the reason for his shock because while you're mooning and waxing internal poetry about his appearance he's kneeling down and you watch as his (kissable) lips move but all you catch is "Akaashi Keiji" and his sleeve rolling up and....oh? Well. Lookee there.

This is nowhere near a cute-meet but you're grinning like an idiot, bleeding and your teeth probably look like shit however all you care is that your words are right there on alabaster skin. Maybe reality doesn't suck so much if someone like Akaashi is destined for an clumsy average joe like you. You're in desperate need of a nurse and some pain medication yet all that is ignored because as you clasp his slender fingers, he smiles this beautiful little smile and all that's running through your head beyond "holy crap, he's perfect" is that your mother was right about that feeling of completion.

"(L/N) (F/N). Nice to finally meet you, soulmate."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll come to realize I suck at endings, if it wasn't apparent already lol.


	3. Kyoutani Kentarou

   You'd always been one to go with the flow, no worries and an ever present easygoing smile on your face. People would probably find your perpetual lackadaisical attitude frustrating if it wasn't so oddly refreshing. It's just too bad your best friend doesn't hold the same views.

  
"Get up you lazy sack of shit, you promised you'd come with me to watch the game!"

  
        Ah, speak of the temperamental she-devil. The swift kick to your side wakes you from your little cat-nap and (e/c) eyes flutter open to focus up where Sayuri stands over you, a scowl twisting her pretty features and directed straight at you. "Sayu-chan, I can see your panties." It's not even a teasing remark, which would take up to much energy to muster, it's simply a blunt (tactless) statement. Something you are prone to making. It also earns you another kick, her typical response to your nonsense. "Shut up idiot! That's an honor meant for Oikawa-senpai's eyes only! Hurry up and let's get going, if we make it in time to see everything maybe I'll be merciful and allow you to live despite your intolerable actions!" As she grasps your arm to drag you along, all you can be bothered to do is allow her as you yawn and idly wonder how you're friends with such a violent girl.

  
"Do you really think Oikawa-senpai would be interested if he knew how brutal you truly were?"

  
To no surprise, she hits you again.

  
Rude.

  
        Despite it being a simple practice game, the bleachers are packed, an overwhelming amount of the crowd being girls and of course Sayuri heads for the loudest pack  ~~of screeching harpies~~  that is the Oikawa fanclub, where she proceeds to join in the euphoric cries of "Oikawa-saaaan!~" The change her personality takes would be unnerving if you bothered to care, but you having more pressing matters to attend to. Like wondering if you'd be able to nap through all this hype or if you'll end up having to subject yourself to watching disinterestedly. Knowing Oikawa's groupies and their volume, it would end up being the latter. You don't even understand the sport, is this the one where they're trying to get goals or..? You shrug, guess you'd spend the whole game bored and completely confused. Oh well.

        ......Whatever volleyball's point is, it involves a whole lot of hitting the ball around. Which is very tiring to watch. Can't they just get their homerun so you could leave already? A particularly loud smack of the ball gains your attention as it connects to the ground (everyone cheers, was that a good thing then? You thought they were supposed to just bounce it around and  _keep it_  from touching the floor. Like hot potato. Volleyball, you find, is mildly frustrating) and your eyes track where it came from, some guy with...stripey hair? Dull eyes brighten slightly with interest. Tilting your head, a curious expression crosses your face as you continue to watch him throughout the game.

  
"What a stupid hairstyle."

* * *

  
         Turns out stripey-chan is actually Kyoutani Kentarou and apparently has been in the same class as you since the beginning of the year. You find yourself observing him whenever you're not sleeping through lessons or skipping class. Sayuri claims you're being creepy but you could care less, it's not as if he's notic-oh. Huh. Looks like he finally caught you if that particularly nasty glare is any indication, though it holds no hope of being effective against your formidable carefree aura. He kind of resembles a grumpy puppy in all actuality.

  
You wiggle your fingers at him.

  
He glares harder.

  
How cute~

* * *

  
        Your staring and his uneffective intimidating continues for months, but beyond that there is no other interaction between the two of you (Sayuri has given up trying to get you to stop, now she's taken to betting when Kyoutani would get fed up with your shit and deck you). The first conversation you guys have is when you have one foot out the window, planning to skip class for a more productive activity (of course it's sleeping, duh) and he shows up yelling "(L/N), what the hell are you doing?!" ........Cute or not, he's not exactly the brightest bulb there is he? I mean, you felt it was obvious what you were doing.... "Climbing out the window. It's sunny out." Perfect weather to sleep in. Except he's looking mighty pissed off with a slight underlying bit of worry and is hurrying towards you to pull you back in, muttering about "idiots getting themselves killed." He's seriously impeding with you relaxation time and for once you're feeling adamant about getting your way, so you tug against him. Needless to say, you both end up falling out the window.  ~~Lucky he didn't land on you, he may be lean muscle but you're a lanky fucker and definitely would've been crushed.~~  As it is, you can't help smirking at his look of confusion when he glances at the ground and what definitely was not a long drop as you stand up and brush yourself off. "You do realize we're on the first floor right?" His embarrassed spluttering is music to your ears. You pat his head with a snicker, his attempts at playing hero proved to be highly amusing and your unexplainable fascination with him only grows.

   
"So dumb, puppy-chan. You are just too cute."

 

  
        You're already strolling away, hands stuffed in your pockets and whistling a casual, jaunty tune when the nickname computes in his brain and despite the fair distance between the two of you, you can still hear his string of curse clearly. He really made it too easy.

* * *

        That first official meeting between you and Kyoutani seemed to open the floodgates because after that, everyone has been subjected to watching the one-sided arguments that never seem to end-it mostly consisted of you provoking him, him blowing up and you continuing to rile him up-all with you smiling your lazy grin the entire time which serves to only anger him even more.

        Sayuri and you are eating lunch when she decides to hopefully end this bullshit by addressing the elephant in the room. "(F/N), I understand you're hopeless in absolutely everything-" "Mean." "-but despite what you may think, we are no longer in kindergarten anymore. And pulling the pigtails of your crush is childish and not an acceptable form of flirting." You blink at her as you sip your juice box, "Crush?" The disbelieving look she gives you is confusing and the carrot thrown is unwarranted (tastes delicious though). "Are you kidding me? I deserve an award for having to deal with such a moron, I swear. Yes, crush. As in how I like senpai, you like Kyoutani. Except your feelings are a hundred times more annoying and I'm sick of watching this train wreck." You continue to stare at her as you take another sip, humming in thought.  
 

"Huh. In that case yeah, I like puppy-chan." 

  
"Obviously. Which is why you need to stop picking on him and just confess already."

 

.....Makes sense. Sayuri may be a violent beast of a friend that spends her time worshipping the ground Oikawa walks on or hitting you, but she's usually right.

 

Confess eh?

  
         Setting your juice down, your eyes scan the lunchroom. Spotting Kyoutani, you shrug and rise to your feet, no time like the present right? Ignoring Sayuri's panicked questioning on where you were going, you strode towards your target, internally cooing over how he seemed to sense you coming near (it's like you two are connected!) when he suddenly looked up, narrowing his eyes at you suspiciously. "(F/N). What do you want now." It's not so much a question as a demand for an answer, which you were happy to oblige.

  
So you grabbed his face and kissed him.

  
        Sayuri's wail of "You idioooooooooot!!!" is especially impressive, though you don't know why she was angry (again), you were only doing what she said. You pull away, slipping your hands from his face as you lick your lips (he tasted like that stupid Famima Chicken he liked to eat all the time, which was kind of gross but also slightly endearing).

  
"You're cute when you're angry." You tell him matter-of-factly before walking out the lunchroom.

 

Confessing was tiring, you'd probably skip and just go home.

 

 

A nap sounded good right about now. 


	4. Yamamoto Taketora

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tiddies

  "-and then she ran away as soon as I walked up to her! "

  
  
Your only reaction to Yamamoto's existential crisis regarding girls and their adversity to him was a drawn out sigh, an effort to calm down before you _took hold of his stupid ~~ly handsome~~ face and _ _gave him a real reason to cry._

 

 

Now, by no means were you a petty person. Quite frankly, you were a downright  _amazing_  boyfriend-anyone else having to listen to their significant other go on a tirade over some stupid woman ~~who wouldn't know taste in men if it smacked her in the face~~ would've sent him careening with a nice knuckle sandwich by now; really, you had the patience of a saint and you should get a medal for dealing with this idiot dammit. But of course patience could only last so long before it became worn down and the line for that crossed when he mentioned 'cute girl' for like, the billionth time. That day alone. 

      

   You knew he didn't mean...much...by it. As big of an idiot as he ~~always~~  sometimes was (especially over the the entirety of the female population), he was loyal to a fault and also the sappiest sap to ever sap, so while he might cry and moan about his inability to talk to girls, you knew he would never take it too far and it was more the 'a girl noticed me' factor that got him. _Didn't make it any less fucking annoying though._  


 

 

         Patience of a saint, petty or not, you refused to lose valuable boyfriend-boyfriend time to some random woman who didn't even give Yamamoto the time of day. Hell no.

 "Oi Yama-chan. Shaddup."

His head jerks up at you and _holy shit_  he is the most dramatic man baby you've ever met-he's crying, tears and snot run down his face and,  _this is what you found attractive (F/n), this is who you decided was prime dating material,_ he's way too choked up over something that literally happens all the time. 

 

  
"But I really thought this would be the day I met a cute kouhai! She would've called me senpai and told me how cool I was!" 

 

 

Jeez. And now he was on his knees pounding a fist on the ground, throwing everything out of proportion as always. Really, if volleyball never worked out he should just go into theatre. What a diva.

 

 

You roll your eyes so hard you're surprised they don't roll out your head. And maybe entertain the thought of bludgeoning yourself to unconsciousness. Or bludgeoning him. You were completely done with this situation regardless.

  
"Yama-chan!"

A solid jab to his ribs with your foot distracts him from his theatrics long enough for you to snag hold of his hands, place them on your chest and force them to grope your pecs as you glare at him heatedly.

"These are the only boobs you'll ever need, ya hear me? So stop whining about about that chick, clean your face and makeout with me dammit!"

His scandalized expression is really too cute, nevermind the mucus and dried tears present.

"(L/n)-san!"

 

 

 

 

~~Though he shouldn't be so embarrassed, you've had your hands down his pants more times than you can count, a smooch fest was nothing.~~   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chap is short, rip


	5. Terushima Yuuji

It was all Yuuji's fault.

 

 

        Then again, that's not very surprising-he'd always managed to draw people into his shenanigans and it always turned to shit. You just hoped there would be no trip to the emergency room this time; it was really hard being the responsible one when your fingers were bent at an awkward angle (let's just say it involved a sled, a roof, and a whole lot of peer pressure) and your boyfriend was freaking out in the background as you explained to the doctor that no, you do not have a death wish, you just have a terrible choice in friends and Yuuji could convince you to do anything just by kissing you until you agreed (though you refrained from mentioning that last bit).

You swore that dumb piercing of his somehow made him a better kisser.

  
It was probably magic.

  
But back to your original point-this was all Yuuji's fault.

"Come on (F/n), it's easy! We go in, wander around for an hour proving this shithole is not haunted and then we get out, therefore winning the bet. I can't wait to rub this in Bobata's face."

Ah yes, the idiotic bet that began it all. In theory Yuuji was right, it was simple enough. Spend an hour in an abandoned house that was supposedly haunted without chickening out, get it all on video for evidence, win a week's worth of lunch courtesy of Bobata, the enabler who'd struck up the bet with your boyfriend. (He also refused to pay for the both of you, said you'd have to share. Cheapskate. "Technically it's his bet. You're only going because you're weak to Terushima's tongue (L/n)-san" he snorted. He wasn't wrong but he could've worded it more tactfully, the team teased you for _hours_ after that.)

So actually, it was half a portion of lunch for a week.

  
In no way was it worth the penalty if you two  _lost._  


Because really,  _streaking??_   Yuuji was all about being wild and that YOLO bullshit, but you did not want to parade around with your junk on display.   
(Apparently since you would be reaping a part of the reward, it was 'only fair you were penalized too!' Dicks.)  
You still had that muffin top to work off dammit.   

"Yuuji, you may be shameless enough to not care how many people see your scrawny ass," a derisive look is sent to the butt in question, "however we can't all be as easy as you."

"First off, hurtful!" He turns on his heel and jabs a finger in your face as his other hand pointed the video camera (was he seriously recording already?) your way, "My ass is fantastic!"  
Of course that's what concerns him.

"Secondly, I'm not easy! We both know you're the insatiable one in this relationship. Who's the one always all," and for some reason he adopts a breathy falsetto that's apparently supposed to be your voice, "'Yuuji, this is so boring, let's sneak off and go fu-"

"Hey!"

You shove him aside as your cheeks erupt a bright red, cutting off the vulgarities he was about to spew. That was not....okay, so maybe you had a habit of dragging him off (to a storage closet, bathroom, locker room, anything was fair game really) for some...frolicking. But in your defense, you were a typical hormonal guy and your boyfriend was hot.

"(F/n) is secretly a minx, don't be fooled by his good-boy appearance." Yuuji whispers to the camera, snickering (and yes, yes he was already recording).

"Shut up Yuuji, let's just get this over with."

Snatching the camera from him you stomp off ahead, ignoring his laughter over your flustered state. Marching up to the front door, you come to an abrupt stop as you peer up at the rather intimidating building. It certainly  _looked_  haunted...

"Don't tell me you're scared~."

  
Despite your jerk of a boyfriend's teasing tone, he reaches down to grip one of your hands and squeeze it reassuringly

  
"It's just an empty house, nothing to worry about."

Aside from possibly getting arrested for trespassing, having to visit the ER once again, or getting possessed if it  _is_  haunted, sure, nothing to worry about at all.

  
"...alright, fine. But you're going first."

He shakes his head with a sigh but still is the one to step through the doorway first, gently tugging you along as he reminds you to capture everything on camera.

"Chill out babe, it's just an hour and you've got me right here. What's the worst that can happen?"

You should have headed for the hills as soon as he said those famous last words.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You guys endured for 35 minutes before running out the decrepit place, cursing and screaming at the top of your lungs because  _you two were not alone in that_ _fucking house_.  ~~Spoiler, it was probably a raccoon.~~  


  
And after having to run around the neighborhood butt-naked with his team making cat-calls the entire time, you vowed to never let Yuuji rope you into anything again.  
 ~~You lasted 3 days, a new record.~~

 

At least you had some footage of Yuuji in near-tears when he thought something had a hold of his leg, only to find out he got tangled in an old rug. If the ghosts hadn't tried to kill you, laughter would have done you in.


	6. Kai Nobuyuki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ehh

 The life of a vigilante was not all it was cracked up to be-you pictured epic battles, dramatic explosions in the background as you walked away in slow-motion, rescuing your boyfriend whenever he was abducted by whatever arch nemesis had it out for you (so maybe you should be glad he wasn't getting snatched but it was the principle of things, every comic book you've read had the damsel in distress love interest, you just wanted that full hero experience). Instead you gallivanted around town helping old ladies cross the street and climbed up trees to retrieve balloons for crying kiddos while decked out in costume, garnering yourself weird looks from anyone around. One time an old woman you helped even had the nerve to pat your cheek as she walked off mumbling about "The youth and their kinks. Should keep it in the bedroom." ...Not exactly the glory and acknowledgment you were hoping for.

         
 You just wanted a little fame and a lot of appreciation, was that too much to ask for?

  
        Grumbling to yourself as you struggled out of your leather suit and into your normal clothes, which was a difficult feat to do while running because _fuck_ you were late, you made sure to take the back roads and alleyways to avoid getting caught....again. Being seen in nary but your Batman underpants and some gloves did not help your cause of being seen as a heroic savior rather than a pervert.  
  
        Shoving suit into your bag and putting on a pair of glasses, you hopped around as you stuffed your feet into your ratty sneakers and then took off once again with much more ease and at a faster pace than before, skidding across the sidewalk as you turned a corner too quickly. The quaint little café you should've been at 15 minutes ago was in your sight and with a determined huff you sped up slightly, nearly running face first into the glass door when you finally made it to your destination. Completely out of breath ~~maybe you should've taken up that offer to go jogging with the volleyball team after all your endurance was shit~~ you wrenched the door open and stumbled inside as you scanned the room for a familiar face.  
  
        Sitting by the window with a cup of coffee in hand and sun rays shining on him like he was heaven sent, Kai raised his opposite hand to catch your attention as he smiles warmly at you-calm, beautiful and ever your opposite, especially in this moment now as you walked over, sweating in an unsightly manner and 99% sure your shirt was on backwards. A testament to what an angel your boyfriend is was on the table in front of your intended seat, your favorite drink and a slice of the cake already ordered and ready to be devoured.

 

        "What have I done to deserve you?" You sigh happily, dropping gracelessly onto the chair and digging in, completely famished from ~~not~~ saving the day.

His eyes twinkle in amusement as they gaze at you from over the rim of his mug and he hums noncommittally, sipping his coffee.  
"That's a secret. If you don't know what it is, you can't stop."

 

  
        People always assumed Kuroo was something of a dreamboat just from looking at him ~~only to find out what a fucking nerd he was~~ , they should have set their sights on the volleyball team's vice-captain because hoo boy, was he smooth. Lucky you.

        Your attention is diverted from staring at him dreamily when you glance over his shoulder at the café's TV where some news report was blaring and suddenly you're enraptured because the story is about  _you_. _You're on television._ Granted, its mostly questioning "why the hell is some teenager in a costume running around doing odd jobs" and wondering whether or not they should bother classifying you as a vigilante when you're not exactly serving cold-hard justice to criminals. But shit, you could care less, you're on TV! (In the back of your mind you note that your outfit does look rather risqué. Maybe that granny wasn't wrong to think those things about you, it looks like you just escaped from an S &M club...). 

 

  
"(L/n)-san."

Finally your efforts were garnering some interest.

"(L/n)-san."

Maybe people would start taking you seriously. Eventually they'd give you a cool nickname and you'd be the talk of the town.

"I understand you're excited about being on the news, but your drink will go cold at this rate."

And then-wait. What.

 

 

        You stare uncomprehendingly at Kai with mouth agape and your head jerks around to make sure no one was listening in on you two before you lean closer to him.  
"You knew?!"

"(L/n)-san..."

  
And there's that pitying smile of his that he gave you whenever you were being particularly obtuse (it happened more often than you liked, now that you think about it).  
"Your disguise is a pair of glasses. I think I'd be able to recognize my boyfriend even when he isn't wearing them."

 

 

An noise escapes you to help convey your offense because your disguise was completely spot-on thank you very much. It worked for Superman, why not you? Perhaps you should stop relying on comics as an example, it doesn't seem to be working for you at all.

Blithely, Kai continues on despite your secret-identity crisis. "Coupled with the fact that I found your suit when I was moving dirty laundry from your bedroom floor, it wasn't hard to draw a conclusion."

 

  
You obviously were ill-suited to the superhero life. Couldn't even find crime to fight much less keep people from figuring out who you were. With a defeated groan your head drops down onto the table with a heavy **clunk**. And you thought you were being totally incognito.

 

          
Chuckling under his breath, Kai pats your hand soothingly and sneaks a bite of your unfinished cake.  
"Don't worry, it's just another secret of yours that I'll keep."  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> reader kun is some kinda vigilante, though he does jack diddly squat in this lolol


	7. Oikawa Tooru

Any game Aoba Johsai played in was guaranteed to bring in insanely large crowds.   
It was a given that where Oikawa went, hordes of girls followed. The stands would be awash with schoolmates applauding and cheering (and an overwhelming amount of "Oikawa-San!" chanted over and over again from the the female population).  
  
And then there was you.   
  
As Oikawa's boyfriend, it was obvious that you'd be supportive of him but you took it to extreme levels. The way you saw it, if you were going to be Oikawa's fan you wouldn't settle for anything less than the best, so those fangirls of his could suck it because they had nothing on you; you were the motherfucking queen and they could all bow down and kiss your feet, the title of "Oikawa's Number One Fan" (and yes, the capitalization of every word was necessary) remained in your possession, never to be handed down to anyone else.  
  
You were at every game without fail, and depsite the sea of people in the stands you easily stood out amongst them all. Huge banners, posters, sometimes even fluffy pom-poms would be waved around enthusiastically as your voice rose above everyone else's, and the cherry on top to your outrageous one-man cheer squad- a shirt with Oikawa's face plastered on the front embellished with bedazzling that you'd done painstakingly by hand.  
  
You were basically a loud, shiny, human disco ball gushing with love and support.  
  
Proud parents and amazed peers were outdone by your displays, the gym would be booming with your unholy screeching of:  **"HELL YEAH, LOOK AT MY BABY GO!!"**  and other various terms of endearments for Oikawa or cutting insults thrown the opposing team's way. The referees have given up on trying to get you to tone things down. Eventually, people came to realize that maybe avoiding the seats beside you was better if only to avoid going deaf and being constantly barraged with "Isn't my boyfriend amazing??" every five seconds.   
  
You were completely shameless in expressing your affections for the handsome brunette and this game was no different with you energetically shaking your pom-poms as you sat front and center in the stands, blowing kisses Oikawa's way every time he looked over much to the amusement of his teammates who jostled him teasingly. It was no surprise to you that they won (nevermind that you were incredibly biased and thought your school's team was essentially invincible) and Aoba Johsai's victory over the other team was capped with your exuberant shouting as you barely contained yourself from jumping over the rails and dog-piling the team. Instead you settled for speed walking to their locker room after the crowds thinned out, totally disregarding the fact that they were in various states of undress ~~though absentmindedly you eyed a certain bara before he tugged a shirt on because damn if your boyfriend's best friend wasn't built~~  as you threw yourself into Oikawa's open arms, nearly knocking him off the bench he was sitting on. 

  
  
"You're so embarassing (F/n)-chan~"  
He complained half-heartedly, slender fingers plucking at your shirt where his own face stared up at him, the fond smile betraying his words. 

  
  
"Love you too Tooru."  
You replied cheerily, smacking a slobbery kiss on his cheek and then giving him several more when he screeched disgustedly. 

  
  
You watched in amusement as the underclassmen were quick to finish changing and make their escape whereas Iwaizumi watched dully (in fact, he looked very close to smashing his head repeatedly into his locker) and Hanamaki and Matsukawa responded in their typical manner of teasing. 

  
  
"Oh Tooru, you're so handsome and amazing, just take me now~"   
Hanamaki swooned against Matsukawa, evidently playing the part as you while the other snickered at his antics. Though Oikawa took that as means to start bickering with the two you could only nod approvingly, that did sound like something you would say and you agreed wholeheartedly with the sentiment.

  
  
In fact...

  
  
Eyeing how gorgeous he managed to look, even when he was sweaty, you could feel desire well up as you nestled your face in the junction where his neck met his shoulder, breathing his scent in. Shit. He even smelled divine. 

  
  
You could see Iwaizumi's face scrunch up into an expression of revulsion as he recognized the look on your face and soon enough he was shepherding the others out the room in true mom-fashion, sparing a dark glare and pointing an accusing finger at the two of you when Oikawa's hands began creeping up your shirt.

  
  
"Don't you dare fuck in the locker room."

  
  
You pretended not to hear him and as soon as the door shut behind him you were swinging your legs over the brunette's so you were seated comfortably on his lap, fluttering your lashes coyly.

  
  
"Why (F/n)-chan,"  
 Oikawa pasted a faux expression of innocence on his face and even gasped dramatially, "if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were trying to seduce me!"

  
  
"Well..."  
You trailed off as your hands buried themselves in his soft hair, twirling the strands around your fingers before leaning in so your faces were mere inches away from each other.  
"Is it working?~"

  
  
Him closing the distance to slot his lips against yours was answer enough.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Safe to say Iwaizumi's warning was completely disregarded and because he had some sort of magical power that alerted him when Oikawa was doing stupid shit, you two had to face his wrath the next day.  
  
And then he made you two scrub the entire locker room with nothing but toothbrushes as a tool.


	8. Terushima Yuuji Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> should I type in the actual titles for these besides just the character's names lol?

You had a problem. An addiction of sorts, you supposed you could describe it as.

Wasn't drugs, you didn't drink (a sip snuck from your mother's wineglass during lavish parties she'd happened to drag you to notwithstanding) and you didn't gamble. You might be a little uncontrolled with the online shopping but that was a vice to be explained another day (or never, you could pry online shopping from your cold, dead fingers).

No, this addiction was of a different nature.

The subject of your fixation was a 5'9" self-proclaimed studmuffin (you didn't agree with the sentiment _at all_ , _really_ ) with a stupid ~~ly attractive~~  undercut and piercings that had the magical ability to make you hot under the collar. And the kind of guy people would probably question as to why someone like you (wealthy, the image of propriety appearance-wise, studious, the type of boy a mother would kill to have her daughter marry) had such an interest in him.

Just the utterance of the name Terushima Yuuji gave you goosebumps and made butterflies flutter in your stomach.  

Staring at him multiplied those feelings by 9000 with an added creep factor bonus.

Which was what you were doing right now, the teacher's droning about the lesson background noise as you sighed dreamily, your hand might have been jotting your notes with startling accuracy for the lack of attention being paid, but your mind was dedicated to Terushima TimeTM as fantasies ran rampant through your head. Terushima walking you home. Terushima holding your hand. Terushima kissing you. Terushima wearing nothing but a frilly, heart-shaped apron as he welcomed you home from a long day of work from the corporate company you inherited from your mother, where he promises to make up for you having to deal with boring meetings and a useless secretary who spent more time playing Candy Crush than doing her job by making all of your favorites for dinner and then offering himself as dessert, slipping off that apron and lying back on the dining table as he lets you have your way with him and-oh. You shake yourself back into present time as the ringing of the school's bell interrupts that... _interesting_ turn of events your thoughts were taking. School was over.

Shrugging at your lack of awareness you glance down at the fruits of your absentminded labor-say what you would about your perpetual influx of hormones, you took some well formulated notes. Even through inattentive jotting down, everything was color-coded and highlighted in a way that would make study guides cry with envy. The only thing that could ruin such beautiful organization was the borderline-blinding neon pink reading "He chews on his pencil when he's trying to figure out a math problem."

What in the world?

Another pink blurb catches your eyes, buried amongst a cluster of definitions: "He has a habit of fiddling with his earrings and staring out the window when he is bored during the lesson. Happens often; wonder what he thinks about."

You start flipping through your notebook with increasing horror, finding little snippets of similar natures somewhere on almost every single sheet of paper you've scrawled on.

How have you gone through your school year without noticing this at all?!

Apparently staring at Terushima has unlocked your inner stalker and killed off any rationality your brain retained, because this was beyond weird; if anyone could read this, it was buh-bye social life and respectable reputation, hello instant ostracization. It was times like this you were thankful for being a former foreigner, you may have given heck for moving all the way from (Country Name) those years ago but being bilingual really came in handy in some instances. Especially now when those, frankly freaky, observations about the object of your affection were transcribed in (language) instead of Japanese, which meant the chance anyone could read them were slim to none. They would just see blazing pink gibberish and remain confused as to why you were writing down random crap in a garish pen color. You'd take what you could get.

Relieved sigh: released.

Well, that was a heart attack inducing couple of moments, rolling up your sleeves with newfound vigor you set aside thoughts about The Notebook (why your mind automatically emphasized that, you didn't know. Apparently The Notebook was a thing and here to stay) to begin cleaning the classroom alongside your peers.

It was when you were putting away the broom after some enthusiastic sweeping (unfortunately not very effective despite your eagerness, a life of pampering and employing maids meant your cleaning skills were less than adequate-thank goodness for helpful and understanding friends who had no problem picking up your unintended slack) that the utterance of "Ask (L/N)-san, he always has the best notes in class!" caught your notice. You blink and hone in on whoever was talking about you, recognizing the one who spoke as the girl who sat behind you, now giggling and fluttering her eyes at you once she realized she had your attention. (Ayano if you remembered correctly? Didn't she confess to you last month? Apparently she wasn't one to be disheartened long if she thought complimenting your _notes_ would compel you to change your mind and accept her with open arms. What an odd girl ~~like you were one to talk you weirdo~~ ). Gracing her an awkward smile, (e/c) orbs trail to regard who it was she was talking toooooooooohhhhhmygolly. Terushima. She was talking to _Terushima_ about you.

You take back those things you said about Ayano-if you were so inclined as to touch any inch of her with your lips (which you weren't, sorry Ayano, no hard feelings) you could kiss her right now for providing this perfect opportunity to talk to your crush.

You barely can contain yourself, almost jittering from how excited you suddenly are, forcing a cough as you brush back (h/c) strands out of your face and attempt to look casual as he makes his way over. Yep, nothing to see here but all natural casualness. Maybe the faux surprised look you pasted on your face at his arrival was pushing it if the raised brow he responds with is any indication, he probably saw you watching them and listening in. Whoopsies.

"Ayano-chan recommended that I ask to borrow your notes," the knowing smirk he flashes made your insides quiver with glee (but oh dear you were totally caught eavesdropping, he _knew_ ), "you don't mind lending them to me, do you?" He could ask you for anything at this point and you'd concede it willingly.

Right. Words. Speak them (Y/N)!

"Of course Terushima-san, I don't mind in the slightest. Here you are, I hope they serve you well!"

Very eloquent, (Y/N), mother would approve immensely.

The smile on your face is much more sincere this time around, taking advantage of a good dental plan and some cute little dimples to try and lay on the charm, you hope he's as dazzled by it as admirers and photographers have been.

It seemed to have worked, at least a little, because his cheeks are turning an appealing pale pink as he relieves you of the notebook.

That appreciative grin of his could give the sun competition, it's so beautiful and bright, and you restrain yourself from falling to your knees in thanks of what a sight he'd blessed you with.

"Thanks man! I'll take good care of it, promise!" And you can only nod as you watch him stick it in his bag and bounce off to what you'd assume was volleyball practice (you'd have to make sure to see if you were free during their next game so you could go watch, but lets be honest, you're always free to go watch him, haven't missed a game yet).

You gather your things and clutch them close with a longing sigh, you'd remember this two minute conversation for the rest of your life.

Waving goodbye at the few people still lingering (for some reason Ayano was staring at you shrewdly as if you were some puzzle to be solved, you wondered what that was about) you head out the room and to your locker to swap your shoes and then outdoors where you can spot the limo parked in front of the school gates, your family's driver Watanabe standing tall as he holds the door open for you.  

Settled comfortably on Italian leather seats, you lean back and release a giddy little cry to express the joy welling up in you.

Watanabe's eyes trail to the rearview window to regard you in amusement as he pulls away from the school and begins the journey back to your home.

"Exciting day at school young master? Sounds as if you received some good news."

Good news, ha! More like the best news!

You clasp your hands in front of your chest and sway, looking as if you're seconds from swooning right there.

"We talked today Watanabe-san! He came up to me, on his own volition, and talked to me!"

He doesn't have to ask who this 'he' was, you've gushed to any and everyone at home about Terushima to the point that even they know random facts about a boy they've never met, memorized from how many times you've babbled about him.

"That's wonderful young master. You'll have to tell Hilda-san all about it when we return, she'd love to hear about it."

There wouldn't be much to share, after all the conversation lasted but a mere few minutes, but you couldn't wait to squeal over it to your grandmotherly maid.

Reaching the wrought-iron gates that separated your house from the outside world, the limo drove along the winding pavement leading to your home and it hadn't even come to a full stop before you were hopping out and running up to and through the front door, backpack swinging carelessly as you resembled something like a teenaged tornado of happiness. Loafers were ejected onto the little shelf alongside the other shoes, your bag hung up on a hook with your blazer and then you continued with darting around, on the lookout for your gossip buddy.

"Now now young master," familiar tutting reaches your ears as you come to a halt and turn to face the elderly woman sheepishly, "you know running indoors is dangerous."

"Ah, sorry Hilda-san.." the rueful expression doesn't last long however, perking up again not unlike an excitable puppy, "But I've got great news!"

She chuckles and wipes her hands on her apron, coaxing you into the kitchen with a simple gesture; herding you onto one of the barstools at the counter, she rummages through the cabinets to begin making some tea, "Is that so? Well I'm all ears, go on ahead."

With the metaphorical starting shot fired, your mouth is racing to fill her in on your day, leaving no details out (well, you supposed your little daydream could remain a secret to avoid sharing) and barely pausing even with the mug of tea she hands you.

"-and then he asked me to borrow my notes, because apparently mine are the 'best in the class', so now I have another opportunity to talk to them when he returns them!"

"Mm, that's lovely to hear dear, you've been mooning over this boy for so long, it's about time you took initiative and spoke to him," her lips curl up into a sly smile as she eyes you over the rim over her own cup, "So, have you given any thoughts about confessing?"

You choke midsip, casting an incredulous look as you right yourself from minor liquid death.

"C-Confess?" A shrill laugh escapes you and you twiddle your thumbs, avoiding her stare to gather your thoughts or waste enough time that she drops the subject.

Was she serious? There wasn't any indication of him having any clue about your feelings, considering you've talk so little during the year that you could count every instance on one hand, wouldn't it be odd and rather out of the blue? I mean the only way he could know is if he caught you staring, which you're at least 99% sure he hasn't, or if he could read minds or understand (language), so shouldn't you sort of ease him into discovering your affections??

Wait...

If he understood (language)..?

Why would you worry about that slim-to-none chance that he could understand...

........

....oh no.

The Notebook.

The Notebook which contained your innermost thoughts and revelations about one Terushima Yuuji-the very person who you'd given The Notebook to.

Hilda and the cooks could only panic when you suddenly faceplanted onto the counter, your very soul leaving your body just then as a result of that horrible epiphany.

Consider (L/N) (F/N) a dead man, because he could never show his face in school again.


	9. Terushima Yuuji Part 2

Except you would indeed be forced to show your face in school courtesy of one merciless Hilda who pried you from your bed the next morning with impressive strength her dainty, elderly appearance belied. With a fond ruffle of (h/c) locks and a Danish to snack on during the ride to school, she gave you the boot with absolutely no remorse, chiming rather cheerfully in a manner not suited to your internal crisis that "This was prime confessing time!" and "Don't do anything I wouldn't do if I were young again!"

...whatever that meant.

So regardless of the heavy feeling of imminent doom hanging over you like a cloud, here you were at school- knuckles turning white from how hard you were gripping your bag as you switched out your shoes and shuffled gloomily to class. If you looked rather paranoid what with the constant glancing over your shoulder and around your general area on the lookout for a familiar flash of blonde hair, well you had the excuse that any second now, Terushima would fling The Notebook into your face, point an accusing finger at you while loudly proclaiming you were a weirdo stalker, and then never talk to you again.

Okay maybe not that was a slight exaggeration. Despite his class clown qualities and tendency to rile others up he was actually a nice guy.

So public humiliation might be out, but he would probably refrain from further interactions after returning your notes.

Point was, either way- you would die of shame and rejection.

Perhaps you could convince him the person in class yesterday was in all actuality your identical twin brother who'd escaped a mental health asylum and after subduing you by locking you in a closet or something, he took your role in life and proceeded to be incredibly creepy by forming an unhealthy infatuation after just one glimpse of Terushima's gorgeous face and writing all sorts of inane things about the blonde and you'd managed to free yourself as well as send your twin back to the asylum, so now the real you was here today and none of what was in The Notebook was your doing at all and.....

Scratch that, that was ridiculous.

You sigh morosely, returning waves and cheery greetings from those you passed halfheartedly. Might as well buck up and surrender to your fate you supposed. Hilda would have to be disappointed when you returned home with not a boyfriend, but a restraining order.

Sliding into your seat, it's not long before you're joined by Ayano who plops rather gracelessly at the desk in front of you, turning to rest her chin on her seat as she regards you thoughtfully.

"(L/n)-san, you look like you haven't slept a wink," here she titters coquettishly, "I bet you've had love on the mind, haven't you?"

(E/c) orbs blink blearily at the female and perhaps all the embarrassment and shame has killed off any sense of propriety and manners within you, because your big mouth decides to open up against your will and force out "I still don't like you that way Ayano-san" much to your mortification.

The next few seconds as Ayano stares seemingly into your soul seem like years but rather than taking offense, you're alarmed to see a knowing smile on her face instead.

"Oh (L/n)-san, don't be silly~ I know when to give up in a competition!" She winks at you conspiratorially, leaning closer as she whispers "Good luck! I'll be sure to put in a good word for you should opportunity come up!" And with that she lifts up and flounces off to her actual seat. Right next to the subject of your affections as well as the indirect reason of your shame. Who apparently had entered the classroom when you were otherwise engaged in conversation with Ayano.

You can see Ayano murmuring something to Terushima as the teacher then walks in, and your heart seemingly bursts from your chest as he glances over and eye contact between you two is made before interrupted by the teacher calling for attention. His eyes break away from yours to turn towards the front and heaving a shaky breath you follow suit, feeling all kinds of out of sorts. He didn't seem disgusted or weirded out, the expression on his face neutral and searching, though what he was looking for you didn't know.

As the teacher drones on, you focus on the lesson, transcribing what you hear onto your paper. It wasn't The Notebook, but it would do for now until its return where you could transfer the writings over though really, you could stand having to write on loose-leaf paper for the rest of the year if it meant avoiding confrontation and the impending fallout to come.

Stolen glimpses of Terushima amongst your fastidious scribbling make up the lesson, and it's the sound of the teacher's textbook closing as you're dismissed for lunch that elicit previous misgivings. However after retrieving your bento and tucking yourself away in the corner of the room, a cursory look reveals that...he wasn't even present. Half relieved and half disappointed, question the class representative when she passes divulges that he'd been enlisted to aid the teacher with some errand. So with lunch over and the day halfway over with, your stomach feels as if its a pit of nervousness because was he _avoiding_ you?

Somehow, you bite your lip and furrow your brows as class carries on once again, that was even worse than confrontation.

From your spot you have clear view of him, his chewed on pencil moving steadfastly in an attempt to jot down everything being covered. Your desk was a row behind his as well as several seats over, so there was good reason for him not to be looking your way and yet with every passing minute of you not garnering any attention, no indication whatsoever of how he would react, the dread building up within you increased exponentially. Perhaps this meant that whatever outcome occurred, it would be one where the absolute worst that could happen would come true. How anything could be worse that what your imagination cooked up, you didn't know, but suddenly changing your identity and skipping town sounded very _very_ tempting.

Hilda's voice suddenly rings in your head. "Have you thought about confessing?" bouncing around in your mind as you stare intensely down at your desk.

A confession was rather distracting right?

Perhaps...

Gears begin turning as your lips purse in speculation. Hypothetically you could divert attention fron The Notebook when he'd return it to you with an unforeseen confession to stun him into confusion. As he grasps at straws at how to respond, you could snatch The Notebook and abscond as fast as you could go.

Well, it wasn't 100% full-proof but it was the best thing you could come up in the circumstances and you supposed it could work seemingly enough. If anything mother was always pushing for you attend a posh boarding school and she would probably be happy enough to have you transferred.

Right. Half-baked plan you'd concocted in 5 minutes it was.

School could not be over with soon enough, where before you were a jittery bundle of nerves dreading having to talk to Terushima, now you were counting the seconds before the bell would ring. If this was to work, you'd have to be quick, in and out without letting anything stand in your way. The bell was almost thunderous to your anticipation-addled mind and you floated through clean up completely on edge the entire time. You'd nearly snapped the broom in half and managed to knock over the trash bin no less than 3 times, but eventually the room was cleaned and your peers were evacuating in a hurry, eager to return home or head to their club. Soon it was one or two stragglers, Ayano, Terushima and you that remained and while you would have preferred absolute privacy to this train-wreck, your heart could not handle any further waiting.

So as a man on a mission, your head held up with as much dignity as you could manage, you strode forth towards your crush ignoring the rush of blood to your face and pounding in your ears.

Absentmindedly you couldn't help but notice the difference in height between the two of you as you peered down at him in trepidation, watching him dig around his bag to pull out The Notebook, just as incriminating as it seemed yesterday.

His mouth opens, to deliver rejection and words filled with negativity you assume, but its you who speaks up first.

"I like you."

He blinks uncomprehendingly, jaw working to shut itself as you visibly struggle with the confession pouring out of you.

"I very much adore you and find you incredibly bewitching in personality as well as looks and I can't begin to apologize for constantly staring at you all the time. Also I'm really hoping you don't punch me for the odd messages I wrote in my notes nor for...well, confessing to you right now...Ah...um," eloquent words deteriorates in a way that would make your mother rip out her hair, year of speech and manner tutoring gone down the drain as you fumble for something else to say, "So I'll just...take this and be on my way, leaving you free to never speak to me again."

You take hold of The Notebook and attempt to tug it out of his hands, but his grip is sturdier than anticipated because he's not...

Another attempt to pull it away is made.

Letting...

And once again another attempt failed.

Go...

"...this endeavor works better when you spare me some decorum and allow me to run away with my notes and my tail between my legs."

He seems to shake off any shock you gave him because he pulls the notes back toward him, which in turn drags you along and as you stumble against him its then you realize he's _laughing. Giggling_ even.

"I was just trying to return these to you. I figured the pink parts were just notes to yourself about the lesson contents since I wasn't able to understand them."

So you ended up overreacting and outing your feelings unnecessarily. Fiddlesticks.

"But now that I know they're actually about _me,"_ its rather unfair of his eyelashes to bat in such a manner that makes your knees weak, "I'm beyond curious. And I'm going to need translations right away."

You gape at him as he slips a hand in your pocket without a care, pulling out your phone from it and with a few taps of the finger returns it back to its place.

"Preferably over dinner. And since you have my number now, you're able to text me next time you're free!"

He releases The Notebook but it seems your brain has gone offline because you don't step back to escape the overwhelmingly close proximity to him, instead seemingly made of stone as you just stand there. Was this what going into shock felt like?

"I knew I felt someone watching me, I just didn't know who," he pats your chest and then scoops up his bag, slinging it over a shoulder as he looks up at with a faint blush conveying mild apprehensiveness despite the confidence in his voice, "but thanks to you I know now! So.." He steps around you, your head turning to keep him in your sight, and slowly begins to back out the room, cocking his head endearingly at you as he winks "Consider this me accepting your confession. Text me!" And with those parting words he speeds off to practice, leaving you behind with a number and probably the beginnings of a heart attack.

"Ah.."

Ayano's face pops up in your line of vision, a smug grin in place as she claps you on the back. "Lets just say opportunity came up and that 'good word' was more like a push in the right direction! Congrats (L/n)-san!"

"...."

"This is where you thank me, preferably over ice cream where we can talk about what you'll wear on your big date."

"..."

"Um...(L/n)-san? You don't look so good."

And for the second time you leave people panicking over you as you drop in a dead faint, the only thing in mind before you black out was worries on how you'd manage to send him a text without suffocating from nerves first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had all these recent ones done forever, aside from the two shot one lol, I was just super lazy and never got around to uploading anything


	10. Sawamura Daichi

"Your team wants to meet....me??"  
  
Decked out in a frilly gingham apron as you sliced lemons and hummed some popular song you'd heard on the radio, you were the picture of domestic housewife...disregarding the fact that you were 100% male that is. The call from your boyfriend doing nothing to interrupt the graceful way you flittered around the kitchen, you simply continued cooking with your phone cradled between your shoulder and ear, though your previously peaceful countenance was replaced with an expression of befuddlement.  
  
"I don't mind but," you begin layering honey and lemon slices in a glass container, brows furrowed as your confusion doesn't waver, "Why would they want to meet me? I only know the basics about volleyball, its not as if I play or anything. The only thing volleyball and I have in common is you, Dai-chan.." Securing a lid on the container you slide it into the fridge and then lean back against the counter as you listen to Daichi blather on about nosy teammates and how apparently knowing their captain was dating someone wasn't satisfying enough, they wanted to meet his significant other-that being you of course.  
  
"So, do you mind? You don't have to stay for the entire practice, you could just come in at the end, introduce yourself before we clean up and leave?"  
  
Its kind of a weird request, no lie, why would the love life of their captain be so interesting that they wanted to schedule some sort of meet-up? What if they just wanted to give you the shovel talk, be all macho teammate and intimidate the crap out of you? You pale, hand reaching up to grip your phone nervously, oh god what if they hated you??  
  
"(F/n)..? If its too much trouble, you don't have to." You hear him exhale and can picture just him running a hand through his short dark hair right now, "But I _would_ like to introduce you to them." Oh thanks, no pressure Daichi. With him sounding so cute and hesitant like that , how are you supposed to refuse now? You grimace but wipe away any negativity as you close your eyes in defeat. Damn, you were just too weak.  
  
"Don't be silly Dai-chan, I'd love to meet them. What better way to get some juicy gossip about my darling after all~?" You laugh off any lingering nerves, falling back to the familiar routine of teasing him.  
  
"....Somehow I feel like my pride is going to regret this."  
  
"Mm, well your gut feelings have always been pretty accurate, so you're probably right~"  
  
He sighs but it's fond and when he speaks he isn't nearly as put-upon as he's pretending to be "Of course. Well I'm the one who asked, so it's my own fault if I leave practice embarrassed beyond relief I guess. Hey, but really, thanks (F/n), I know its probably a little overwhelming and you're nervous, but you have nothing to worry about. I'll be right there with you and everything."  
  
"Pfft," You scoff even though he managed to hit the bull's-eye with one shot, "it'll be fine Dai-chan! I think the only one worried here is you. It's just like I'm meeting your second family or something, and I managed to win over your parents with no problems. This'll be a piece of cake!" You two exchange your typical slew of 'I love you' before hanging up and then your setting the phone down, the soft grin he always managed to worm out of you still on your face.  
  
And then you're hit with the realization of what your words bring, the smile dimming into something more panicked and (e/c) eyes become vacant as you feel a bead of sweat drip down. "Oh my god, it's _totally_ another meet-the-family..."Â You were fucking doomed.  
  
You glance morosely at the fridge before rolling up your sleeves, guess it was time to make those snacks more team-portioned. Perhaps you could bribe them into liking you..?

 

++++++++

 

This was it.  
  
Your fingers clench around the stack of containers in your hands as you stare up fearfully at the gym doors, they manage to look much more ominous than reality with the underlying knowledge that behind them lied possible judgement, rejection and maybe some scary-as-heck players. Daichi wouldn't be on a team of delinquents though, right? Maybe it'll be more like he's leading a bunch of baby ducklings? Sweet, adorable, innocent little ducklings...yeah...  
  
Nodding as you manage to steel your courage, with thoughts of fluffy yellow babies in mind, you nudge the doors ajar.  
  
Just find Daichi first and hide behind him as you meet his ducklings, then you'd be A-okay.  
  
Poking a head through first before inching your way inside, you peek around the gym, nibbling on your lower lip as eyes rove the surroundings for the familiar figure of your boyfriend.  
  
"Oi, you looking for someone?"  
  
You freeze in place as the rough tone reaches your ears, then ever-so-slowly turn your body, as if you were in a horror movie about to look back at whatever scary monster stood behind you. Which wasn't that far off base, you squeak and nearly drop everything in your arms when your gaze meets the fierce look trained on you. You take in the shaved head and the rather unnerving expression and then notice that telltale jersey you knew matched Daichi's.  
  
Oh god.  
  
Definitely _not_ a duckling, **abort abort abort!**  
  
The noise you release is not unlike a low whine as you spin on your heel, maybe you could outrun this possible-delinquent (and what the fuck Daichi?? You weren't supposed to have a team of delinquents, this was the complete opposite of what was meant to happen dammit) and burrow yourself in the safety of Daichi's arms, never to emerge again.  
  
"Wha-hey!"  
  
Seemed scary-kun didn't take too kindly to you ignoring you, but you had more pressing matters. Like finding a nearby bathroom or something to lock yourself away in.  
  
And then you manage to run into what feels like a brick wall, sending you crashing down onto your ass.  
  
Your knuckles are turning white from how firmly your holding onto the snack containers as (e/c) orbs make the incredibly slow travel upwards of the seemingly giant stranger in front of you. Direct eye contact is what breaks the dam and next thing anyone knows, you're reduced to waterworks and burst into tears as a drawn out, woeful "Daiiiiiiiiichiiiiiiiii!" rings throughout the gym.

 

++++++++

 

"Jeez, I knew you were nervous (F/n). You should've just called me beforehand, I would've met you at the doors and walked you in, you didn't have to do it alone." Daichi shakes his head as he rubs your back to soothingly, your thin arms clinging to him tightly.  
  
"Idiot! They were supposed to be cute, little duckies! I'm gonna get the shovel talk from your big, scary henchmen now; I should've known you were secretly a mob boss or something!"  
  
"Ducks? Shovel talk?? What..(F/n), they're not going to intimidate and threaten you in defense to my virtue, if anything you're the one who needs to be overprotected you dramatic little thing. And there's no way I'm a mob boss." His callused hands gently grip your cheeks as he stares intently at you, "Are you alright though? Tanaka means well, but he has an innate talent of scaring off the underclassmen."  
  
Your hands slide up to hold onto his as you whisper dolefully, "He looked like he wanted to eat me.."  
  
"Now you're _definitely_ being dramatic," Daichi rolls his eyes affectionately and tweaks your nose, "that's just his face. You worked yourself up before coming here didn't you? I mean, mob boss? Really?"  
  
You guiltily glance away and purse your lips, "Mmmmmaybe... I watched a couple movies to prepare myself. They always threatened to cut off the guy's toes and feed him to the fish so.."  
  
"We're a high school volleyball team, not the Yakuza." He sighs again and leans forward to rest his forehead against yours, soft smile playing on his lips, "What am I going to do with you?"  
Â   
You let out a breath and press against him, fingers fiddling with a loose string from your cardigan, "You could kiss me then help me pass out this junk? I made honey lemon bribery slices to win them over, though I kinda butchered that first impression.."  
  
He snorts, "You have food; their stomachs will win out and they'll forget everything soon enough."  
  
He draws back, cocking his head as he regards you with unmasked endearment before shaking his head with a low chuckle, pulling you to him again to press chapped lips against yours for a quick peck before pulling himself off the ground with a grunt. Callused hands reach down for your soft ones to take, easily lifting you to your feet with barely any effort. Daichi collects the containers you'd set aside, able to hold them all with one arm as his other hand is preoccupied with holding yours.  
  
He only offers a smug wink at your sullen mutter about what a showoff he was, and then he's leading you out of the locker room you two had relocated to in order to calm you from your overemotional meltdown  
  
The team is grouped in a cluster of varying heights, shapes and hair-colors , any ongoing conversations dying off as heads swerve to look at you two. Now that you get a second look at them, they're not as nearly terrifying as you'd first thought. Sure, the two from before aren't exactly...soft looking, but the fluffy, orange one looks like sunshine incarnate and a flowery aura seems to surround the one who could only be the Suga-san you've heard about, which makes the tall brick wall Asahi-san...yikes, now you felt a little guilty getting spooked from someone Daichi mentioned so often.  
  
Daichi's throat clearing garners everyone's attention, and you have to admire his ability to take charge, many of them looking upon him with thinly veiled respect (though the tall, bespectacled beanpole just continued looking like someone pissed in his cereal this morning). "Let's try this again shall we?" He nudges you forward some, "You wanted to meet my boyfriend. This here's (L/n) (F/n), he's kind of a crybaby and his imagination has a tendency to go haywire so don't sweat it if you spooked him a little." A pointed narrowing of the eyes at the ones responsible is thrown then.  
  
"D-Don't tell them that!" you gripe over your shoulder before facing the pack of boys and two girls in front of you. "Um, as he said, I'm (L/n) (F/n), Dai-chan's boyfriend.." You bow, cheeks flushed under their scrutiny, as you offer the sweetest smile you can, "I'm sorry for before, but it's nice to meet you! I uh," you wrangle the containers from Daichi with a little difficulty and a lot of maneuvering before you hold it up as some sort of peace-offering, "I made snacks for everyone if you all were hungry.."  
  
Theres a cacophony of approvals and 'nice to meet you' and even a 'so cute, can we keep him?' thrown in that meets your ears and any preceding fear is nonexistent as you're beaming and surrounded by grabby hands, hungry boys and much more tactful managers reaching and passing around food.  
  
Soon everyone is paired up or grouped together as they share the containers and feast, occupying the gym floor with no complaints in favor of eating. You wriggle happily in your spot beside Daichi as you hold up a box to the fluffy orange-hued boy, "Ah, please, eat some more Hinata-san.." You chuckle as you watch him chomp down on the honey lemon slices, sometimes wrestling with the dour-faced Kageyama for them.  
  
"Ah, you got a little something.." Without even thinking about it you're pulling out a handkerchief to wipe a stray drizzle of honey from his cheeks, only realizing when he tenses and you're pulling back self-consciously. "Ah, sorry, I wasn't even thinking..." "You remind me of Suga-san! Kinda like a mom!" he chirps and everyone freezes at his words, a few eyes darting between you and Daichi.  
  
"So, if Daichi-san is the dad and Suga-san was the mom..." The tiny brunette with a flash of blonde...Noya-san?...trails off as the gears in his head start working. "But Daichi-san is with (L/n)-san.."  
  
Tanaka brings a hand to his chin as he wonders, finishing off his friend's thought process, "Does that make (L/n)-san the stepmom?"  
  
A scattering of chuckles and gasps are released, Suga-san snickers and elbows Daichi who gauges the second-years with a blankness. "This again? I thought I told you to drop the whole mom and dad thi-"  
  
"I promise to be the best stepmom ever!" Your sudden declaration interrupts him, earning a slight smack to the back of your head as he grumbles, "Don't encourage them (F/n)." His complaints have no effect though, and as everyone begins collecting the empty containers and cleaning up there are stray remarks of 'dad', 'mom' and 'stepmom' the entire time.  
  
"Look what you've done," Daichi shakes his head as he locks up and the two of you set off to begin the journey home, "now they'll never drop it." He refuses to let you carry the boxes, regardless the fact that they're empty and more manageable for your twiggy arms, stuffing them into his gym bag for the time being.  
  
You snicker and shrug unabashedly, "I think its cute. And it just means I have to show up more often, can't let them remember me as the stepmom of neurotic tendencies. I'll wipe their memories of my crying face. Plus I still have to get that juicy gossip about you."  
  
He reaches out to take your hand with a squeeze, "Wasn't so bad in the end though, right? Thanks for showing up. Means a lot."  
  
You squeeze back and step closer so you can lean against his arm with a huff, "You owe me one now though. You were the one supposed to be getting embarrassed today, I won't let the opportunity by next time!"  
  
"Mm, I'll take my chances."  
  
"Hmpf," you toss (h/c)-hair haughtily, "I'll make you eat those words Dai-chan, you'll rue the day you underestimated my pettiness."  
  
"Yeah, yeah, shaking in my boots."  
  
The conversation dies down into a comfortable silence as you two continue walking, broken only by your shy murmuring of "I love you Dai-chan."  
  
"I love you too, even though you're a bit of a crybaby."  
  
  
  
 ~~then you push him into a puddle and run off the end~~


	11. Nishinoya Yuu

"(L/n)-senpai! There you are!"

You'd been in the middle of slinging your bag haphazardly over your shoulder when the sudden call of your name caught your attention; recognizing the girl charging towards you as a fellow member of the cooking club you were a part of, you'd entertained the thought of escaping out the window to avoid her for about 2.5 seconds before she'd already managed to come to a stop right in front of you, determined gleam in her eyes and a container clasped tightly in her hands. Well, guess escaping was out of the question then. Refraining from unleashing a sigh that would fully express how much you weren't looking forward to this conversation, side-eyeing the door longingly. "Yamada."  
  
She giggles and pops off the lid, releasing a scent that could only mean your doom if her intentions were indeed what you were dreading, "Senpai, we've been in club together for a while now, I told you its Yukiko! Anyways, I made some cookies..." She ducks her head and offers the aforementioned "treats". "I was hoping you'd try some and give me your opinion!"  
  
You're a stone-faced bastard with a seemingly permanent expression of perpetual monotony. Its times like this when you wished you could convey emotions better so you could successfully show how much you _really_ didn't want to try any noxious concoction your underclassman somehow managed to create. "Yamada. This is something you should ask the club leader instead." Better that pretentious chef-wannabe than you, because from the look of the oddly purple fume-exuding lumps Yamada called cookies, they would only bring death should they get anywhere near you. "So since there's nothing else, I'm gonna go-mmmpf!" Or she could stuff a chunk of poison into your mouth without any regards to your personal space or life. That's cool too.  
  
"So?" She practically vibrates in her spot, looking far too excited than someone trying to commit culinary murder has any right to be. "How is it?!"  
  
Shitty, gritty and vomit inducing to put it mildly.  
  
You reluctantly swallow, if only to get it off your taste buds, and try to formulate the words that could properly convey how they were the worst things you'd ever had the misfortune of trying and she should just quit trying before she really _does_ kill someone.  
  
"By now you should realize you're a lost cau-" **"Ah, Yamada-san there you are!"**  
  
The interruption comes in the form of Nishinoya Yuu, your miniscule classmate and childhood friend since your elementary days; he slides to your side with a look of panic and makes sure to speak over you, completely drowning out any kind of critique you'd attempted to crush her pride with.   
  
"Nishinoya-senpai?" Yamada's eyes widen the slightest bit, which isn't surprising; while you may have a reason to approach her considering you attended the same club (though there's no instance where that would ever happen, you weren't there toÂ make friends, much less with hopeless cases such as her) Yuu had no link to her. Unless, you supposed, he was looking to confess to her though your heart gave a small pang at the thought. That was highly unlikely however, considering the amounts of times he's whined how he'd never get a girlfriend having to babysit you-you'd be offended if it weren't true, often it seems he's more your keeper than anything and you had a habit of abusing that role to monopolize his time when he wasn't busy with volleyball.  
  
"Someone from your club was asking for you," he sends her a blinding grin that could oppose the sun, "I figured I could relay the message since I was headed here anyways!" He then fakes a double take, looking between you and Yamada as he rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, you withstand rolling your eyes at his theatrics though she seems to eat it up with amazing naivety, "Oh. I wasn't interrupting anything, was I?"  
  
Finally, an escape route.  
  
You eagerly take advantage of it, hand gripping your bag as you turn your head away from the girl with a bored air about you. "No. She was just leaving." Tone bland, you leave Yamada no room for argument. She flinches minutely and secures the lid to her box of death, clutching it to her chest as her eyes drop to the ground, seemingly more interested in inspecting her shoes now.  
  
"Right...U-Um, if you'll excuse me..." She manages to send him a morose quirk of the lips before she scurries off to find the aforementioned club member if that wasn't some excuse Yuu strung together in order to rescue you from further socialization. You both watch her exit and as soon as there's no further sign of her he slugs you in the shoulder with power that belies his tiny stature.  
  
"Ow." You purse your lips and rub at the spot, (e/c) eyes staring into his soul in askance as to why you were suddenly being abused. "What was that for Yuu..."  
  
He huffs and gathers a handful of your uniform in his fist as he shakes you to-and-fro in frustration, "You're kidding me! Don't act as if you're not aware what a jerk you were!"   
  
"You're going to wrinkle my uniform."  
  
"That's the _least_ you deserve, you dead-eyed asshole!"  
  
"Rude. Besides, it's her fault. She shouldn't have accosted me." You avert you gaze and if your facial muscles were not borderline immobile you'd have been pouting. He releases a noise that sounds almost like a teapot finished boiling water; while it threatens to burst your eardrums at least he'd stopped shaking you.  
  
"Don't think I didn't know what kinda crap you were about to say; you do not tell a girl she's a lost cause and should quit! She cooked for you dammit, and you didn't even bother with a _thanks_??"  
  
You tsk, "If I wanted someone to cook for me, I wouldn't have bothered joining a club learning how to do it myself. Anyways, there are a lot of words I could use to describe what she did. Cooking is not one of them. If she wanted my opinion, she should be fully prepared to receive it." You sidestep your friend and trudge forward, eager to finally leave, "I'm gonna be late at this rate. You'll be as well. Run along to your sweat shop before Sawamura buries you alive." You have one foot out the door when he snags the back of your blazer, drawing out a dull 'ouch' from you as you're abruptly jerked back. "...I'd just like to remind you we're in a public place. Murder is not advised."  
  
"(F/n)." His eyes narrow at you with seriousness that's rare to be seen from him and your fingers twitch as you avert your gaze from them. He may have been one of the only people aside from your parents who could read your blank slate of a visage with ease, but that also meant he had the inane talent of making you feel guilty when in any other instance, you wouldn't have given a shit. The look of disappointment might not have been one he used often but if it was, it was usually directed towards you-much to your chagrin. "You're sitting today's meeting out. And you're apologizing to Yamada-san tomorrow." Your head droops slightly as you scuff the floor with a foot. Yeah, you should've expected that; he's never let you get away with being a dick before, why would he now?  
  
"...alright..."  
  
Once again he's releasing his grip on you, instead reaching up to ruffle his hair with a put-out sigh. "Don't sulk. All you have to do is apologize and it'll blow over, just like always." Shaking his head, he looks up you, smiling wryly, "Come on. You can stay and watch us today, no need to make your mom ask why you're home early." Nudging your shoulder with his (though really its his shoulder and your arm) he begins to lead the way to the gym with you trailing behind.  
  
You were fine with him playing keeper, it meant that his attention was yours to have whenever you stepped out of line; and let's be honest, with your blunt way of talking and the fact you could care less about other people's feelings, you had a tendency to forgo stepping and instead seemed to leap miles past the line. Yuu had his hands full with patching up the things left broken in the wake of your personality, however there were moments when you wished you could be less of a burden, though for some reason friend didn't sound completely right either. You disregard the confusing swirl of sentiments within you, all they succeeded to do was confound you.   
  
The walk to the gym is silent from your end though Yuu seems to try and wave away the awkward tension lingering from the incident, chattering on and on about the pop quiz your teacher had administered and how, true to your expectations, he'd completely bombed it. You don't contribute more than vague sounds and shrugs or nods but he knows despite your seemingly indifference to the conversation, you're listening. While you tend to ignore even the teachers sometimes, Yuu could always count on you listening to him.  
  
It didn't slip your notice that you were like an unruly dog who obeyed only his owner and though he never commented on it, there was no way Yuu could be completely oblivious to it either. Neither, it appeared, could Tanaka whom, once he saw you enter the gym after the libero and plop down sulkily on the ground near one of the benches, called out to you "Looks like you've been leashed again, eh (L/n)??"  
  
Suffice to say you rewarded his (not untrue) remark with a good ol' flip of the bird.  
  
Coach and manager offer no attempts at chatting, well aware now that if they did, all they'd gain was a vacant look and no answer whatsoever. Instead you busy yourself with homework, pausing in between scribblings to look up and watch the boys practice though the only one you have eyes for is Yuu. He really was amazing at what he did, you mused; added to the fact he was cheerful, kind, and easy on the eyes, if it weren't for you being some apathetic shadow forever following him, he really could be swept away by a cute girl. Your grip on the pencil clenches to the point of snapping it, picturing him hand in hand with some dimwitted female who could never hope to deserve him.   
  
"What's got your panties in a bunch?"   
  
You peek up at the subject of your thoughts, Yuu raising a brow at you as he gulps down some of his water. His carefully gelled hair is beginning to droop in some places, strands coming loose to curl slightly over his forehead and he's glistening with sweat, chest heaving the barest amounts. He's certainly a sight and you make no attempts at disguising your staring. For some reason that escapes you, there's another pang in your heart.   
  
"Don't ever get a girlfriend." You don't know why you even bother mentioning it, but for some reason the demand falls from your lips anyways, "I won't share Yuu with anyone."  
  
He gazes uncomprehendingly before he turns away with his palm covering the bottom half of his face, shoulders shaking in silent laughter. "(F/n), do you even realize what you're saying?"  
  
You blink. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Ah," he sobers up, fond smile beaming at you, "don't worry about it, I know you'll understand soon enough. 'Til then, I'll be patiently waiting. So don't take too long, you hear?"  
  
You blink again, still lost, but nod regardless. "I don't get it, but anything for Yuu."  
  
"Jeez...." His cheeks pinken as he rubs a cheek self-consciously "How can someone who's capable of being so rude, be so cute sometimes?" He shakes his head as if to rouse himself from whatever dazed him. "Never mind, I gotta get back to practice. You just get to thinking real hard about what you told me and you really mean by it." He begins jogging back to the court, throwing a final statement over his shoulder, "And get to writing that apology to Yamada-san! Don't think sweet talking me will get you out of it!"  
  
"...huh?"    
  
"Good luck kid, from what I've seen: you're gonna need it." There's a comforting pat on your shoulder as Ukai snickers. Shimizu nods to you in some silent, encouraging way and you can even see some players who'd been nearby offering smiles with varying levels of pity or amusement.

 

  
  
Why did it seem like everyone was in on some secret that you were not aware of?


	12. Ushijima Wakatoshi

The first time you saw him, you were elbow deep in fertilizer, hadn't washed your hair in like 4 days and had the deadlines of 2 essays, a pile of homework and a group project giving you heart palpitations from stress. Needless to say you were a hot mess and, despite whatever your grandmother may claim, completely justified to react the way you did-when an attractive guy walks into the place in which you're employed and you look like shit, it is not an overreaction to catapult yourself over the counter and hide out under there until he leaves and you stand firmly by that reasoning. Your grandma begged to differ and you were exiled to manual labor in the backroom lugging bags of soil and pots to-and-fro.

 

The next time he'd come in, you were definitely more put together if not a little mopey. Schoolwork had slightly died down giving you a temporary reprieve, so while your academics weren't currently killing you, the lack of social life you had certainly was. College and work didn't leave much free time to hang with what few friends you had and while you'd fallen to using a dating site in order to establish romantic connections of any kind, the glaring red zero over your inbox seemed to mock you every time you logged on. (You didn't understand why, you thought the chosen picture depicting you posing with a trophy you'd won in some obscure food eating contest was fairly unique. Sure, you might've had crumbs all over your face and someone was throwing up in the background but c'mon, it adds character!)

 

Granny had left the store in your questionably capable hands while she went out with her sewing circle and business was slow so you were free to sulk as much as you pleased, and sulk you did; sad, rainy movie-moments where the main character stared out the window had nothing on your level of brooding. Days spent doing nothing but attending school and hiding out among the shop's flowers and succulents was nothing to boast about, you lamented to yourself as you scrolled through the various social media accounts on your phone, looking on enviously at the posts of friends and acquaintances getting married or going off on some vacation out of the country. Â Fujioka Akiko just got a huge promotion and sizable raise, Nakashima Chiyo was abroad in Europe visiting her foreigner girlfriend, Saito Jiro's wife gave birth to their second child. Ugh, all those people being happy and fulfilling their dreams and aspirations and here you were suffering from loneliness, student debt and the woes brought by boredom. You sigh and set aside the phone, dropping your head onto the countertop releasing a drawn out groan. Here you were, complaining about everything and anything, yet there were worse things than having an unbearably normal life. Like chlamydia. "Then again I'd need an existing sex life to acquire STDs in the first place..."

 

"I was under the impression STDs weren't something people usually desired."

 

The sudden interjection sent you reeling despite the monotone delivery and once again you managed to embarrass yourself seconds in on mystery hot guy's arrival, yelping loudly as you slipped backwards off the stool and land in a heap on the ground.

 

A head of brunette hair slowly reveals itself as he cranes over to stare down at you with a look that's unfairly judgmental considering he just appeared out of nowhere and tried to give you a heart attack.

 

"It's not good work ethic to be on your phone at your place of employment." With that frankly _unnecessary_ tidbit of advice, he draws away and goes back to whatever he'd been doing before when you were still unaware of his presence.

"...what the _fuck_."

Thankfully your grandma returned by the time he was ready to pay (according to the receipt, his name was Ushijima), apparently adding a new plant to the collection as she checked him out. (Oh god and here you were hiding ~~again~~ behind a particularly large stack of pots checking him out in a _completely_ different way. You definitely deserved that critical look Granny leveled you as soon as he turned his back to the two of you).

And with that it seemed the flood gates opened because this had become some sort of routine; Ushijima came in every week or two for another plant, said something vaguely confusing and almost borderline insulting from the frank way he talked, you'd embarrass yourself or reply back with something particularly snarky garnering what might have been a smile (you embarrassing yourself tended to amass more of those maybe-smiles than anything and you didn't know how to feel about this attractive specimen possibly being amused by your inability to function like a normal adult) and then he'd pay and leave. (At least you'd leveled up to actually working the register yourself when he did, your grandmother refusing to bail you out after the last 10 times she had to do it). And with time you've come to notice that whenever he showed up, your nervousness wasn't completely unfounded because his dark eyes always seemed to be trained on you. Mildly disconcerting yes, but you'd like to imagine that perhaps he was checking _you_ out as well. Or at the very least hope he wasn't staring at whatever you'd managed to get smeared across your face at the time-soil, stains from petals or leaves, leftover lunch, anything was fair game.

Once again you were lazing about at the counter, staring idly up at the ceiling and questioning your boring existence when he'd come in. Brown eyes met (e/c) ones and you two exchanged nods before he bee-lined for his pick of the day as you watched; looked like his interest lied in the cacti today. It was a curious thing, how often he came in to buy something new, at this rate his place must've looked like a jungle from the amount of foliage he constantly bought. Unless the reason he kept coming back was for replacements...

"Are you a serial plant killer or something?" You prop your head up on a fist and raise a brow, turning the tables on him for now it is _you_ who looks unfairly judgmental. "Us shop employees _are_ here for a reason you know; informing people how to not murder flowers is one of them. And I promise I'll only laugh at you a little."

The pause after your attempt at conversation begins to reach new levels of awkwardness and you regret even trying as you try to wave away what you said and maybe become one with this counter, never to speak again.

"I was advised to pretend to be bad with plants in order to garner your attention."

Say what now.

"However, I saw no reason to outright lie so instead I allowed you to draw your own conclusion. I got you to talk to me without having to kill anything," He nods to himself with a little cactus in his hands, "And have amassed an extensive collection in the meantime. I suppose the advice was helpful in the end then."

"Wait, wait, wait. Let me get this straight." You stare at the other, flabbergasted, "You kept coming here...for _me_??"

"And the plants."

Holy shit, talk about a miracle right there; the good-looking, mysterious regular who handled plants with overwhelming tenderness that you'd been crushing on for weeks now...is apparently not as unattainable as previously anticipated. Holy shit.

"Right..." You were feeling a little faint, wondering if you were actually at home sick and this was all just a fever dream. 

"I was also told I should ask you out, if that's what my intentions in this endeavor were." He walks closer to you, that heavy gaze of his focused on you as he sets the cactus on the counter.

"And is that what you've been aiming for this entire time?" God, you hoped with ever fiber of your being the answer was an affirmation. You were even beginning to lean closer to him, at the edge of your seat to hear what he had to say,

"Yes."  
 _Fuck yeah!_

An enraptured smile spreads across your face as you shyly glance down at the cactus, "And I assume you're taking this little guy?"

"Yes."  
Was it crazy you found his lack of social grace endearing? Probably.

"Well then," you scoop up your hoodie from your chair to slip it on as you step out from behind the counter, picking up the plant as you walk to the door, flipping the sign from 'open' to 'closed', "this one's on me and you can pay me back by buying me lunch. And afterwards you can invite me over to check out your collection, to make sure that you aren't really lacking in a green thumb and trying to save face. I couldn't possibly date someone who has no idea what he's doing."

"I told you that was a ploy for your attention, not actually what was happening."

He falls into step beside you as you exit the shop, the two of you bickering light heartedly. 

 

Granny will probably kill you for closing early when you come back, but explaining the extenuating circumstances were sure to curb any lingering annoyance- she'd just be happy to not have to deal with your pining bullshit around the shop.


End file.
